You know me. I'm one bossy lady, and since I can't be there tonight to hug you and laugh with you and make sure you're happy, here are some long distance requests I have for your birthday. Yes, I know it's your day to ask for things, and not mine, but bear with me here: I'm posting from my BB and hating every second of it so I deserve a little something.
On this day, I, Miss A, command you, Miss B, to:
Kiss a boy, any boy, just for luck.
Hug everyone, specially people who hate being hugged.
Take a dive (sans flashing, please).
Flash, if it'll make you happy.
Blow out the candles and eat the cake.
F*ck your allergies. Have a pizza.
Play the piano.
Do something you'd never tried before.
Open a present. If no one gives you anything giftwrapped, go buy yourself something and ask them to giftwrap it. You need to tear some paper today, to be happy.
Hold someone's hand.
Get someone to confess a secret to you, as a present.
Paint your nails a funky color.
Screw beauty parlors, wear your hair wild today.
Put on a killer dress.
Call someone who forgot to call you and wish THEM a happy birthday.
Drive to a building with 20 floors at least, and press all the buttons up to the 20th. Every time the elevator stops, think of the years in your life, and how quickly they go by and how much we have to be thankful for. It'll be a weird but great ride, I swear.
Take a pic by yourself as if you were hugging someone, so I can photoshop myself in later.
Play twister and/or monopoly.
Do NOT discuss politics or problems or people. In fact, don't talk about anything that begins with a P.
Refuse to eat veggies.
Drink water from the hose.
Don't look in the mirror.
Forget to put on one sock.
Have a dark chocolate.
Smile until it hurts.
When they sing happy birthday, sing along, at the top of your lungs.
Write a letter to yourself, that you'll open in a year.
Say supercalifragilisticuespialidocious, every time someone asks you how does it feel to be 20 years old.
Make a long distance call.
Speak only french for 30 minutes.
Don't drive, get someone to be your chauffer for the day.
Draw. Doodle. Dwaddle. Do.
Memorize the lyrics to a song you love but never learned.
Stick out your tongue at random strangers.
Wake up reeeeaaaaally late tomorrow.
And last but not least, please, remember that even though I couldn't be there tonight, wherever I was I raised a glass and drank to my luck, because in all the world there's only one Bdarkness and I'm fortunate enough to call her my friend.
Happy birthday, B!